It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I showed him my bush... on skype.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
