her vagine was all disorganized.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
