I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
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