I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Randomize