David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Randomize
