so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
