Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
