is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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