I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I was not drunk enough for that final.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
