There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize