Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
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