OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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