Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
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