Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
