i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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