My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Send help, water and tortillas.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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