I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
