Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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