Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
