I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
