I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize