I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
