in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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