Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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