Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
