ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Randomize
