I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Randomize