i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
