he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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