I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
