Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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