You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Randomize
