That's intense
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
