I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize
