i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
