quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize