real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
