Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
