I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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