spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
