Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
