bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize
