Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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