did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize