Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
