Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
