NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
