My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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