you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
