I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
