he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
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